Time is a linear thing. The way I've imagined the abuse I experienced and that period of my life is like a dot on a line. A big, dark, ugly dot that takes up more of my line than I wish it did. My life is the line; your life is the line. It keeps going, and as it does, it gets further and further away from that dot.
But the thing is... it's still connected to it. That dot will always be there -- a dark, ugly spot. However, as you get further away, it becomes smaller. Maybe your line extends to a new page that the dot isn't on, but it's still connected to.
The new page is a new season of your life, and every time you get a new paper and start drawing that line, you have to look back to what's behind you. Sometimes, you'll do this, and it will hurt. It will ache. It will be so heavy, it feels hard to breathe.
It would be nice if we could just erase that blemish, huh? Just flip the pencil of life and erase that one spot from our memory.
It's easy to think that's what healing does. "To find healing..." Well, that sounds like it's a place to reach, a state where the past, abuse, what you've been through... is forgotten. Gone. Completely gone.
But that is not what healing does.
Healing is being able to look at that dot (the pain and darkness) and not let it crush you. Healing is when you'll be able to look at that dot -- to see it in the distance -- and say, "It's there, but it's not me. It's there, but it's not my identity."
Healing is being able to look at that dot (the pain and darkness) and not let it crush you. Healing is when you'll be able to look at that dot -- to see it in the distance -- and say, "It's there, but it's not me. It's there, but it's not my identity."
Healing won't eliminate all the tears. It might not get rid of every nightmare. It probably won't erase each memory...
But you'll be able to face them and know the pain, abuse, and trauma DO NOT CONTROL YOU ANYMORE.
You might still have the scars from the chains... but they will no longer hold you down.
That... that is healing.
Elizabeth Mae Wolfram is an author, blogger, and entrepreneur. She's drawn inspiration from difficult life experience, including abuse and trauma, to bring God-glorifying stories into this world.
Her heart through starting Rise Anew is to bring a resource to women who have walked through and overcome unimaginable situations. Her story is proof that we can still stand strong... regardless.
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